The one point I find tricky is the part about fast responses—I find this does work well when people are “in the zone” together, but if one person’s in the zone and the other isn’t in the same zone, it can just feel like interrupting/not fully listening and then it doesn’t create that floating/nicely bouncing off each other quality.
So it’s a tricky dance in practice, but the suggestion to offer some craggy affordances is a good, practical one!
Appropriate side note! I also have experienced wanting to get out of a conversations that I’m sure felt zone-y for the other person, where I grudgingly took the obvious doorknobs, to not offend them. When that zone happens with both people though, it’s amazing how you can start at one conversation point and end at the metaphorical other end of the world.
Develops into some really practical advice! Interesting points about people preferring mundane topics over supposedly impressive feats, and questions that veil egocentricity (I think I’m guilty of those sometimes).
Really good stuff in here.
The one point I find tricky is the part about fast responses—I find this does work well when people are “in the zone” together, but if one person’s in the zone and the other isn’t in the same zone, it can just feel like interrupting/not fully listening and then it doesn’t create that floating/nicely bouncing off each other quality.
So it’s a tricky dance in practice, but the suggestion to offer some craggy affordances is a good, practical one!
Appropriate side note! I also have experienced wanting to get out of a conversations that I’m sure felt zone-y for the other person, where I grudgingly took the obvious doorknobs, to not offend them. When that zone happens with both people though, it’s amazing how you can start at one conversation point and end at the metaphorical other end of the world.
Develops into some really practical advice! Interesting points about people preferring mundane topics over supposedly impressive feats, and questions that veil egocentricity (I think I’m guilty of those sometimes).